Patience, grasshopper. SEO isn’t instant gratification—it’s a slow burn with explosive payoffs. Typically, you’ll start seeing traction in 3 to 6 months, depending on your industry, competition, and strategy. Good SEO is like planting a tree: nurture it with great content, solid backlinks, and technical optimisation, and it’ll grow. Quick fixes are for amateurs. Play the long game, and you’ll dominate the search results.
If your ad spend is burning cash faster than a pyro with a flamethrower and you still can’t see a single conversion, it might be time to fire your ‘marketing guru.’
Trying black-hat SEO is like pissing in the wind—you get a quick thrill, but end up covered in your own mess when Google penalises you.
Keyword stuffing is basically the SEO version of wearing too much cologne; you think you smell fantastic, but everyone else thinks you stink.
Running PPC ads with zero targeting is like calling random phone numbers at 3 a.m. and hoping someone wants to buy your crap. Spoiler: They don’t.
When brands slap 25 hashtags on every social post—#WeGetIt #YouDontKnowHowHashtagsWork #Stop #NoOneCares #PlzStahp #HashtagAbuse #MyEyes #SendHelp.
If content is ‘king,’ then some blogs are the royal court jester, juggling crap no one asked for—yet wondering why the bounce rate’s sky-high.
Sending daily promo emails is like sliding into someone’s DMs every hour: you’re either super desperate or extremely bored—either way, unsubscribes are coming.
Agencies claiming they’ll get you ranked #1 ‘overnight’ might as well say they can teach your goldfish to drive. Both are equally believable—and equally dangerous.
My PPC campaign had such a low CTR, I had to check if I accidentally set the audience to ‘people who hate me.’ Spoiler: That wasn’t an actual setting.
Scrolling LinkedIn feels like reading self-authored obituaries: ‘RIP My Competitors, I just closed a massive deal!’ Calm down, Brad—some of us just wanted to see if you had a job opening.
© 2023 - 2024 • Vi Digital Ltd Company No. 15950835 Yes, we’re legit. The government says so. • All Rights Reserved • Developed by Vi Digital
© 2023 - 2024 • Vi Digital Ltd Company No. 15950835 Yes, we’re legit. The government says so. • All Rights Reserved • Developed by Vi Digital
